


only in my dreams

by yeosangies



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, i don't really know how to tag this if im honest, i wrote this when i was sad, kind of, seonghwa lives in yeosang's dreams, so he thinks, some smut but it's just the end of it, yeosang is very much in love with seonghwa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 12:28:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28618068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yeosangies/pseuds/yeosangies
Summary: if seonghwa wasn't real, then why could yeosang still feel the warmth of his touch every time he woke up?
Relationships: Kang Yeosang/Park Seonghwa
Comments: 10
Kudos: 32





	only in my dreams

“yeosang.” 

though hongjoong spoke right next to his ear, the sound of his voice was still distant. he was wrapped up in his thoughts and didn’t have the mental capacity to listen to the words that hongjoong was saying. 

“yeosang,” he repeated, a hint of irritation present in his voice. yeosang merely shifted, pulling his knees to his chest before resting his cheek on the top of one. he shot a glance towards hongjoong to show that he had heard him this time, that he was _paying attention,_ but both of them knew that he wouldn’t take in anything that was being said. 

hongjoong inhaled a sharp breath once he realized he caught yeosang’s attention, reaching hesitant fingers up to his hair to brush the blonde strands back. “you realize that he isn’t real, don’t you?” 

yeosang’s eyes closed. _he was. he had to be._ there was no way that he _couldn’t_ be real. just like that, he had stopped listening to hongjoong once more. 

“yeosang, yeosangie… listen to me,” hongjoong pleaded. he was sitting in front of him now, his palm placed against his cheek as he ran the pad of his thumb soothingly across yeosang’s cheekbone. his eyes fluttered open once more to take in the presence of his friend. hongjoong was there and he was touching him and he felt _safe._

_was he ever safe, though?_

“he’s just in your dreams, yeosang. you know that… you know that he will never be here with you.” 

a single tear slipped from yeosang’s eye and rolled down his cheek before landing on his jean-clad knee. it wasn’t often that he cried, especially in the presence of another, but he couldn’t help it. hongjoong was telling him the words that others dared not, sharing with him the reason that everyone else he knew side-eyed him quietly whenever he spoke. 

maybe he was just in his dreams, but he felt so real. yeosang could still _feel_ him. the lingering warmth of his fingers against his skin stayed imprinted in his mind. _if he were just a dream, how could his touch still be so clear to him?_

yeosang remained quiet, lifeless. he wanted to sleep.

hongjoong pulled his hand from his cheek, studying him for a moment before exhaling a soft sigh.

“please promise me that you’ll think about it, yeosang. think about how he is only there when you’re asleep, but never here when you are awake and need him the most.”

once again, yeosang shut him out. his eyes closed, and he showed no hint of acknowledgment. 

he ignored the sound of hongjoong leaving him, numb to the thought that it may be the last time he’d see him again. 

  
  


he was warm.

his hands ran across yeosang’s bare chest, palms flat against his skin. it felt good; it felt good to be caressed and it felt good to be treated so tenderly. 

and each thrust into him caused yeosang to cry out, his back arching up off of the bed. tears sprung to his eyes, though they were quickly kissed away, murmurs of praise whispered into his ear. yeosang reveled in it, drank all of it up.

 _“seonghwa, i love you!”_ he sobbed out as he came. his orgasm hit him hard, pleasure wracking his body as he shuddered under him. yeosang could feel seonghwa’s eyes watching him, admiring the way he fell apart beneath him.   
“you are so beautiful,” seonghwa whispered, hips stilled with his cock buried deep inside yeosang. yeosang hiccuped in response, nuzzling his cheek against the warm hand placed on his cheek. seonghwa’s touch was unlike anything that he had ever experienced before. it was soothing. it was serene. and it all belonged to _him._

“seonghwa,” yeosang murmured, eyes opened as he gazed up at him. seonghwa was breathtaking. “

“why aren’t you real?”

he seemed to ponder this question a bit, combing his fingers through yeosang’s damp hair. 

“i am.” 

“then why don’t you exist outside of my dreams?” yeosang sniffled. “hongjoongie doesn’t believe me… doesn’t believe that you exist. and i don’t… i don’t blame him. i seem crazy when i talk about you, being in love with someone who isn’t physically there.” the flow of tears started once again, and yeosang was pulled towards seonghwa’s chest as he cried. he could feel seonghwa petting his hair, cooing in his ear as he tried his hardest to calm him down. 

“maybe i am not there in person,” seonghwa started, pressing soft kisses against yeosang’s forehead, “but i am here. i am always here. each night, i’ll see you. is that not enough for you, yeosang?” 

yeosang remained silent, trying to contemplate what to say.

“i just want everyone to know that you’re real, that you’re not someone i made up in my head.” 

seonghwa pulled out of yeosang, pressing a final kiss to his forehead before standing from his bed. they were in seonghwa’s room, and the moonlight shining through the windows illuminated his bare body as he stepped over to his closet. yeosang watched him open it in curiosity, blinking stray tears away from his eyes. seonghwa dug around for a bit before finding what he was looking for and returning to yeosang’s side. the bed dipped as he sat on it, reaching for one of his hands to place a cool, heavy object in it. 

“what is this?” yeosang quietly asked before flipping it over. 

“a compass,” seonghwa replied. yeosang inspected the object. it was made of gold carved with intricate leaves and petals, and hidden behind the glass was an arrow that pointed directly towards seonghwa. he sat up a bit, outstretching his arm to the right. he watched as the arrow shifted once more towards seonghwa, and yeosang knew. 

“if i’m not real,” seonghwa started, a daring smile curled up at the corners of his lips, “then you better find me and prove that i indeed am.” 

yeosang awoke with a gasp. a glance around the room revealed that it was his, and he exhaled a quiet sigh as he laid his head back against his headboard. 

that was until he felt the familiar weight that he had in his dream. shakily, he brought his hand into his vision to reveal the same compass from his dream. 

he was real. and he was going to find him.

**Author's Note:**

> i don't rlly kno what to say abt this tbh. i listened to dreamland by glass animals and smacked my keyboard for an hour and came up with this while i was sad LMAO
> 
> uh. yes. thank you for reading! 
> 
> kudos and comments are always appreciated <3 
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/slutsangs) (18+)


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